Hurt and Forgiveness

Today God brought so much peace to my heart, that He prompted me with this question, "Why aren't you letting go of the hurt?"

Hurt had since been my company when I began to understand people's speech or action to me.

And all these years, how I deal with hurt was to try as much as possible to forget it by indulging in those things that I shouldn't be. These things had been driving me away from God, His voice had become softer in my ears, His Word were blurry in my mind and the throne in my heart was given to something else.

The hurt since my childhood until today, were made by no more than family I loved and trusted, friends I cherished and even church I looked upon to. And I realized that by pretending to be strong, that what they had done wasn't a big deal at all or simply pass it away by a humour weren't helping.

And God is telling me, "Rachel, you are not being yourself, the one I had created."



And I argued with God, "These people that I had loved and trusted so much, why would they hurt me with abusive words, lies and even betrayal? How could they have done all these to me? And most importantly, why aren't they feeling sorry for what they had done? All I ask was just a simple word, a sincere apologizy."

Then I realized, I realized Jesus Christ was hurt far more than me, the hurt that He bore, the betrayal by His beloved disciple, shamed, beaten and crucified by the very own people that He loved, and He came to teach me this very lesson, that only by forgiveness, the love that found in this forgiveness could cover over a multitude of sins, and this love had also broke down the wall between God and us, and God so loved us that He had sacrified Jesus Christ in order to be reconciled with us.

And as I cried out on the hurt I had been felt all these years, I was hugged by God's very own nail-pierced hands, telling me that, "I am here with you."

Then it reminded me, God waited long enough than me for the people He loved to feel sorry and who am I to be in position of choosing not to forgive, to hate and to judge.

And I just want to said this to all who had been felt hurt and was exhausted of keeping this away from people by wearing a mask, though you may look strong outwardly, you inner is broken and it can only be healed by Jesus Christ who had once broken for us.