PASSION

One thing I didn't like about blogging was often I found my posts at different time were contradicting. This was actually bothering me for quite some time where I decided to give up blogging for readers would find me a rather unstable person. My stands were not stable.

End up, I discovered that this is actually a good thing, it means that I am constantly growing and changing my perspectives.

Or to say, if I am willing to be committed to this relationship with God, He will constantly bring me from one place to another place, like a teacher, teaching His daughter new things everyday.

If we tried to act smart, we would remain in the same place and God wouldn't move. Because at the time we felt so proud about what we knew, it was hard for us to accept something that would freak us out yet that is supernaturally true.

This is why Jesus said, '“I praise you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, because you have hidden these things from the wise and learned, and revealed them to little children. ²⁶ Yes, Father, for this is what you were pleased to do..." -Matthew 11:25

I used to be so sensitive to people around that I chose to be silent rather than saying something wrong. I chose to give up blogging because I dare not to have any defect in my writing. I was so indecisive in making choice for fearing any choice would be a regret. I hardly cracked a joke as I was afraid that the situation would turn silent rather than to laughter.

After all I found these were unhealthy feeling.

Believe it or not, life's worth making mistakes. If we seek to be perfect in all things, this is not a life anymore.

Just as if we seek to be smiling all days but prohibiting ourselves from crying and feeling angry, then we are not human anymore.

Live life and live with passion.

If we are not passionate at all about what we are going to do but instead always stick to low-risk choices that would make us sound and safe, then you are BORING!

Don't weigh the benefits and harmful effects when we are doing things.

Do the things we love, Love the things we do!

Be BOLD, Be PASSIONATE, Be THANKFUL, Be LOVING!

His Grace is sufficient for us after all.

PASSION IN ANCIENT GREEK MEANS TO SUFFER!

So, are you ready?

inside the water...

(Today, I awkwardly put on swim suit for the first time of my life and together with my gut, I soaked myself into the water...)

The feeling being inside the water is so different......

As I (I was taught to) took a deep breath using my mouth(hooo) and immersed my head into the water, I see a different world, a different dimension(through my goggle), with the light shine into the water(I only get to see this a lot in movies) and that is so beautiful...

Instant peace came when the voice from the outside world is filtered...

(They told me to relax)

And so I let go everything...I wasn't using any force...and then amazingly, I felt a force was lifting me up...and I was floating...I was floating...

This made me to come to think of God...

God asked us to let go every burdens and took up His yoke. But how many of us has actually listened?

When we are trying to depend on ourselves, just like for the first time before I was taught, I tried to kick my legs so that my body could float, but I couldn't and I sank and then I started to be panic...

When I tried for the second time, and for this time, I was completely surrendered to the water, letting the flow to bring me where to be, and surprisingly I found myself being lifted up...

And that is just so peaceful, when I finally let go...and I managed to see another dimension of things through the water, like which the problems we often made big by our own pessimism...

The feeling inside the water is so good, now I know why Bethany Hamilton would love the water so much...

just wanna end with Psalm 131 here...

Psalm 131

A song of ascents. Of David.

¹ My heart is not proud, LORD,
my eyes are not haughty;
I do not concern myself with great matters
or things too wonderful for me.
² But I have calmed and quieted myself,
I am like a weaned child with its mother;
like a weaned child I am content.

³ Israel, put your hope in the LORD
both now and forevermore.

Man looks at the outward appearance

It had been a long vacation away from my blog. But I really feel like sharing this as I think it is something worth to be pondered.

Just now as I laid on my bed and prepared to hibernate, a verse came across my mind.

Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.

This is from 1st Samuel 16:7.

I felt guilty when I thought of it as I really had to admit that yea, sometimes or maybe all the time, I was looking at the outward appearance.

Only LORD looks at the heart.

So, my mind began to search for people whom I might have mistreated just because I looked at their appearances instead of their hearts.

Surprisingly, yes, I found a few. More surprisingly, their hearts are not attractive as well. and worst, their attitudes could be putting your patience into test.

So, this came to my mind. I found that TV is cheating us all the time. They liked to make up story where the pretty one always come to bully the outwardly not attractive one. Those who are not beautiful outwardly are always beautiful inwardly. But no, not really applicable.

In fact, they are worst. And I found that I can explain this for them. Self-pity and jealousy. 'Why am I not smart enough, pretty enough, handsome enough, fast enough?' 'Why am I always the last?' 'Why is he getting the good things all the time?'

So, horribly, this turn to rage after a long period of time. People curse. 'Hopefully she won't make it this time.' Or gossip...'This guy looks handsome but actually I found that he doesn't shower.' etc, etc, etc......

Can you see that? Can you see what comes out when people simply think they are not good enough?

So, why would we always find we are not good enough? Why would these people being so miserable? Do they deserve to be self-pity, to curse?

NO.

Because again, the LORD looks at the heart. If you measure by what the LORD sees and not by what people sees, you can't be burdened at all.

Or to say, you can't be bothered.

Imagine that the LORD is looking at our hearts and He found all these wicked ways in us, how awkward He would be if He were to act like us? But GOD is GOD, Hallelujah!

We felt awkward being with people who appeared not cute enough for us. Don't you think Jesus feel awkward as well when you behaved in such a way, claiming yourself as His follower?

and Praise the LORD, when He looked at all these wicked ways, for He so loved the world, He gave His One and Only Son, so that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have an everlasting life. (John 3:16)

Even tough the LORD looks at the heart, He still forgave for what we contained.

I guess for people, we would celebrate when the person who were annoying to us had perished.

In my own understanding, people who do not have God bear self-pity often. This includes those who believe in God but doesn't put God in the first place of their lives or maybe even out of their Top Ten lists.

Self-pity shows that you do not appreciate who you are(as a child of God) or what you have(what God would provide you).

When we don't look to God, often we forget who we are and what we have in Him.

When we acknowledged Jesus is the LORD of our lives, all these things such as, 'Why she is always the one who receives attention? Why he is popular among the girls? Why is he so good in studies? Why she can have a Platinum credit card for shopping?'

All these things do not bother us anymore when we know that Jesus is with us. He is more than all these things.

Let me quote from Jake Hamilton's 'Freedom Calling' here,

"What have I to lose, if all I have is You

What I have to give, that wasn't given
I know that You have set me free, and freedom's never free
King of Glory, have Your way in me"

You might wonder what about those who are born rich, handsome, pretty...I mean, come on, they worry more as they are always striving to be the best among the best since the best is still not the best. And those who seems to be rich in resources, I started feeling pity for them, cuz their lives would be so poor. Their view is limited to one side of the world, the good things, pretty things, expensive things......

Sometimes, my life can be motivated by the desire to glorify God.

But, I found I must look to Jesus again. Cuz when I'm trying to use the world to glorify God, God doesn't like it. He owns the world. He doesn't need us to provide Him good grade, high ranking or bla bla bla...whatever in our minds.

He doesn't want us to try to glorify His name in our own way but in His way.

Things we always think to be for His glory often are not.

If I was to achieve something by competing, by being selfish, by refusing people,

then I gained what I wanted,

People would think that I am good, but they would never trust that the all-loving God is with me.

So, I guess that comes back to what Jake Hamilton said again,

'King of Glory, have Your way in me'.